Knowledge is power – especially when cultivating sexual pleasure for both ourselves and our partners. Satisfying our erotic desires is essential to our happiness and the success of any marriage or long-term romantic relationship yet many of us leave our carnal yearnings to chance and wishful thinking; hoping that our partners will one day become erotic mind readers and know – without a word being spoken – just what turns us on. Unfortunately that only happens in romantic films and literature.
If we truly want to experience mind-blowing sexual play, both partners must first:
Determine what it is that they want and need
Openly share that knowledge with each other
The more precisely we can define what we want during sexual play, the easier it will be to communicate our preferences to our partners. Knowledge also builds sexual confidence and provides that necessary first step for further sexual exploration and experimentation. By providing each other with a specific road map, we significantly increase the likelihood that the erotic journey will be a sensual and fulfilling one for both parties.
Defining You Sexual Play Preferences
To assist you in discovering your sexual preferences, I have provided a series of specific questions regarding sexual play. Spend time answering each question and ask your partner to do the same.To boost intimacy, communication and a sense of fun, I recommend doing this exercise together at a time where there will be no distractions when you can openly share and discuss your responses.
A word of caution: be prepared to get aroused.
Timing What is your favourite time of day to have sex? Mornings? Afternoons? Evenings? Late night? For those of you responding with “all of the above” – good for you – but try defining what it is specifically about that time of day that you most enjoy. For example:
Do you enjoy morning sex because it sets a very pleasurable tone to the rest of your day?
Do you enjoy afternoon sex because it provides a sensual break?
Do like evening sex because it helps you to unwind and re-connect with your partner after a long day?
Do you like late night sex because you often wake up aroused?