Sex with the lights on certainly has its benefits. The ability to view a lover in all their glorious nakedness while making love can be especially stimulating and increase the level of arousal between you. When we allow our partner to see us fully during this most intimate of acts, it not only conveys a trust in them but a confidence in ourselves which will only promote a better sexual experience for both parties.
However, sex in the dark also has its merits.
Choosing to occasionally indulge in lovemaking with the lights off, we are provided with a scintillating opportunity to heighten all our other senses – touch, sound, taste, smell, intuition – since we can no longer rely solely on visual cues for arousal and direction. The sight of our partner ceases to be our primary erotic trigger and so we need to seek other ways to arouse and be aroused instead. As we enter this shadowy world with our partner, we both begin to use a potent new tool – our erotic imagination.
Without sight, we are now forced to tune into our other senses if we are to successfully pleasure our partners as well as ourselves. In the darkness, we must now find our way by listening for the meaning in our partner’s sighs and silences. We must navigate the terrain of their body by touch, taste and smell alone. Contact is often much more purposeful while in the dark to avoid fumbling. Sexual exploration is taken to a whole new level since we are now forced to use our other senses to locate our lover’s most tantalizing body parts.
As pleasure receivers, the darkness offers us the occasion to place our partner’s hands, mouth and other body parts exactly where we want them without embarrassment. Under the cloak of darkness, we no longer need to feel self-conscious about our bodies and can completely let go of our sexual inhibitions. With the lights off, we are catapulted into another sensual reality that is both private and immediate. Our sense receptors become amplified so anything our partner does to us feels even more thrilling. In the dark, we are left vulnerable to the whims of our lover and there is tremendous excitement in that.
Enveloped in darkness, we are also no longer restricted by the notion of separateness. As our lover and ourselves kiss, caress, grab, writhe and shiver in ecstasy, there is no longer a “yours” and “mine”, no longer a sense of height or width but a unity that enables us to elevate our lovemaking beyond the physical to something much deeper and more profound.
And we can experience it all with just a simple flick of a light switch. ♥